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The number of divorces involving infidelity has surged in the last decade.
“You have people every day, whether it’s spouses, partners, hookups, anything, they’re going out and they’re just searching for sex,” Freeman tells Bustle. “They’re searching for casual sex and, a lot of the time, they’re not open to very much relationship.”
Sometimes sex is just a way for people to end a relationship when they don’t want to leave. Sometimes people feel disinterested in a relationship, but, because of an existing connection with someone else, have sex with them anyway. But those aren’t the relationships that are cause for divorce.
The most common type of divorce these days are interpersonal divorces. These marriages are often rooted in infidelity, and in order to save the marriage, people will often have sex with others in order to stay in the relationship. Usually, the other spouse knows about the affair, and has chosen to stay.
Instagram is the gateway to casual sex for many young people.
Sexuality has been traditionally associated with romantic love, says Freeman. But in the past decade, the idea of casual sex, which was never really accepted before, has become really accepted in society. “The point of casual sex is if there is no commitment in this relationship, you get to hook up with someone you like,” he says. “You don’t have to worry about someone else getting hurt or you having an STD.”
The reason casual sex has become so normalized is because it has been mainstreamed. Chat rooms and websites like Instagram became popular in the 1990s because that’s when they started being used for dating. As a result of Instagram and other social media being mainstream, it allowed people to discover sex online. Users of apps like Tinder know that women are more likely to respond to photos of themselves or use photos they’ve already taken of themselves, rather than photos of somebody else. There’s a higher chance that they’ll swipe right if they like the photo.
This isn’t to say that hookup culture is the problem — it’s not. Hookup culture is not a term which has been created to suggest that casual sex is a bad thing. In fact, people aren’t really having casual sex anymore. They’re having sex with other people because they want it — and dating apps are helping.
“These apps [have] changed the way we think about sex in America,” says Katherine Spillar, associate director at Hollaback!, a national organization devoted to
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The science is in: Casual sex is dirty, and worse: It’s unhealthful, said researchers who studied the ramifications of a casual hookup. “Most of the research has shown that casual hookup is associated with a very low-rated physical and mental well-being,” says Patricia Noethen, MD, PhD, an obstetrician and gynecologist at the University of California, San Diego School of Medicine and co-author of the Psychology Today article “Casual Hookup: Is it Good or Bad for Your Relationship?” For instance, the odds are pretty good that if you find out your friends casually hooked up with his ex one month later, you might start getting the heebie-jeebies if you find out you’re doing the same thing. (Not to mention there’s always a chance that they’re using protection you didn’t use. You are responsible for the protection you use, period.)
Up to 1 in 4 people have had sex without a condom.
Although meeting someone for sex is fun, cool, and exciting, there’s really no reason to trust anyone. Hooking up with a stranger and having sex with a condom is nowhere near as good as having a true sexual relationship with someone you love. The casual hook up is nothing more than a fantasy experienced only by drug-seeking psychopaths and sad, lonely people. While it might seem fun and get a rush of dopamine, casual hook ups really aren’t all that satisfying. A casual hook-up is more of a short-term fix than a solid, healthy relationship with someone you connect with on a deeper level and really get to know.
Many people say hooking up is a good way to practice safe sex.
Despite the “think of the babies!” BS, having a casual hook up can actually be a good thing. For one, you could actually fall in love! But it’s not all bad. Hooking up with a stranger could actually be a good thing for your relationship if you’re looking for a “just one more time” type of thing.
It might seem fun at first, but casual sex can make you unhealthier.
You might feel better about yourself when you sleep with someone new. But it’s a pretty inaccurate comparison to think of yourself as some guy’s P.O.V. “There’s this idea that you are masturbating when you have sex with someone,” says Dr. Noethen. “But you are actually in

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